How to Set Personal Goals for Long-Term Success?
Are you tired of setting goals that never seem to stick?
If you’ve been in that cycle of hyped-up resolutions that fizzle out by February, I get it. I've been there too. And over the last few decades working with parents—particularly through the mental health tools we've built at Level Up—I’ve learned a few things about *what actually works* when it comes to setting and sticking to goals.
Let me walk you through what I’ve seen work again and again for real people—especially busy parents—who are trying to stay focused without feeling overwhelmed.
The problem isn’t your motivation
Most people blame themselves when they fall short. They assume it’s laziness, or lack of discipline. But truthfully? That’s rarely the case.
What I’ve learned (and what Dr. Selk and I talk about all the time) is that people aren’t failing because they aren’t trying—they’re failing because their goals are too abstract. They haven’t set up a structure that works *with* their brain instead of against it.
That’s why we’re so big on systems. Instead of relying on feelings or random inspiration, you need a *process* that creates clarity, tracks progress, and adjusts as needed.
Start small but think long
Everyone wants that big transformation, but most people underestimate how powerful it is to just show up *daily*. If you’ve read this breakdown of goal-setting, you know what I mean—*habits beat motivation every single time*.
When I’m coaching someone, especially a parent juggling work, kids, and mental load, I always say: forget the five-year plan. Focus on the five-minute plan. Show up for five minutes every day to build momentum. Let it grow from there.
Give your goals some teeth
One trick I use personally is to make sure goals have both a *trigger* and a *time*. For example, instead of saying, “I’ll journal more,” I commit to writing in my journal immediately after brushing my teeth each night.
Stacking habits like this makes them easier to stick to. And if you're using a dedicated journal, it becomes a visual cue that reinforces the behavior.
Track. Review. Adjust. Repeat.
There’s a rhythm to this, and that rhythm matters. Goals don’t survive on paper. They survive in the day-to-day. I recommend doing a quick review every Sunday: What worked? What flopped? What do I want to keep?
This isn’t busywork—it’s where change actually happens. As *this article on goal-setting benefits* explains, reviewing your progress helps lock in both clarity and confidence. Here’s the link if you’re curious.
Make your goals personal—not Pinterest-worthy
I’ve worked with too many people who set goals based on what looks good on Instagram, not what actually matters to them. And the result? They burn out fast.
Your goals need to *fit your life*, not your feed. That’s why I encourage parents to start by asking themselves: What’s one thing I want to feel more of this month? Then reverse-engineer from there.
You’ll have better luck sticking with a plan built around *your* values. If you're unsure how to even define that, take a look at how we talk about defining personal goals in a way that makes sense for your real life.
Steal this method that actually works
One of the simplest, most useful frameworks I've used—something Dr. Selk and I have refined over years of client sessions—is called METHOD:
- Measure what matters.
- Evaluate progress weekly.
- Time it with real anchors in your day.
- Habit stack it with things you already do.
- Optimize by cutting what doesn’t help.
- Do it anyway, especially when it’s hard.
I’ve seen this approach click with busy parents in a way that generic goal-setting never did. It takes the stress out of “getting it perfect” and replaces it with *daily wins* that build real momentum.
Goals and mental health are twins
I’m constantly reminding people: your mental health and your personal goals are not separate. They work together. The more intentional you are about what you’re working toward, the stronger your mindset becomes.
We cover a lot of this in our app—and if you're someone who thrives on routine, I’d highly suggest checking out the 4-minute mental training ritual we use with parents. It’s simple, but *shockingly effective*.
And if you’re trying to get clarity on where to even begin, one of the best things you can do is look at the key points of personal development. That framework alone might show you what’s missing in your current approach.
My challenge to you
Start today. Not next week. Not on your birthday. Today. And keep it ridiculously simple. One action. One habit. One review.
The biggest lie we tell ourselves is that small steps don’t count. But they do. *They’re the only ones that ever stick.*
References
- Clear, James. “Goal Setting.” James Clear, https://jamesclear.com/goal-setting. Accessed 7 May 2025.
- “Benefits of Goal Setting.” PositivePsychology.com, https://positivepsychology.com/benefits-goal-setting/. Accessed 7 May 2025.